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On this page: Overview
Key Takeaways
Use three short parts: name the sound, say the reaction is yours, and make one small ask. For example: “Chewing sounds set off a strong reaction in me. It isn’t about you. Could we put some music on while we eat?”
In a calm moment, not while the sound is happening. Mid-meal, it tends to come out sharper than you mean.
Because the reaction tends to happen at almost any volume. An ask that changes the situation, such as background music, a seat swap or a mute button on calls, gives the other person something they can actually do.
In a 2023 UK study of 772 adults, only 13.6% had heard the term, even though 18.4% met the threshold for significant misophonia (Vitoratou et al., PLOS ONE).
Yes. You can ask your line manager for a reasonable adjustment, such as a quieter desk, but under the Equality Act 2010 it is a request, not a guarantee.
Choose a calm moment away from food, make it about your reaction rather than their manners, and ask for one specific change. “Chewing sounds set off a strong reaction in me. It’s not you. Could we put some music on at dinner?” is easier to agree to than “please eat more quietly”.
One small, concrete change: muting while eating on calls, a desk further from the shared lunch table, or being fine with you wearing earplugs or headphones for focus work. For anything formal, talk to your line manager about a reasonable adjustment, which is a request, not a guarantee.
A short line helps, so nobody thinks you’re shutting them out: “I’m wearing earplugs for the meal. It’s not about you.” Keep them for chosen moments and take them out afterwards. Our guide on when to wear earplugs and when to take them out covers the timing.
Night-time is its own conversation, and our guide to sharing a bedroom when sounds bother you at night covers what to say and what tends to help.
Trying to explain misophonia to family, friends or colleagues can feel harder than sitting with the sounds themselves. Most people have never heard the word. Finding a loved one’s mouth sounds hard to be around does not make you a bad person, and it does not make them one either.
The specialist misophonia service at Oxford Health NHS Foundation Trust notes that because misophonia is not well known, people often struggle to get support from family, friends and even health professionals. What tends to work is one calm sentence and one small ask.
At Bollsen, we make reusable hearing protection trusted by 1,000,000+ people, and our guide to earplugs for misophonia covers the product side. This page is about the words: scripts for a partner, a parent, a flatmate, a colleague and a friend.
What goes into a good one-sentence explanation?
A useful misophonia script has three parts, each one sentence long: name the specific trigger sound, describe the reaction as your own, and ask for one concrete change.
Owning the reaction matters. “When I hear chewing, my body goes straight into fight-or-flight” tells someone what happens without blaming them, while “you’re so loud” does the opposite. The ask matters just as much, because “be quieter” rarely helps when the reaction kicks in at almost any volume.
Better asks change the situation rather than the person: music during meals, a seat swap, a mute button on calls, or “I’ll step out for five minutes and come back”.
| Say this | Instead of this |
|---|---|
| “That sound sets off a strong reaction in me. It’s not about you.” | “You’re disgusting when you eat.” |
| “Could we have some music on while we eat?” | “Can you chew more quietly?” |
| “Could you mute while you’re eating on the call?” | “That’s so annoying.” |
| “I’m stepping out for five minutes, then I’ll be back.” | Leaving the room without a word |
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Pick a calm moment away from food, then keep it simple: “Some eating sounds, especially crunching, set off a strong reaction in me that I can’t switch off. It’s nothing you’re doing wrong. Could we have music on at dinner, or could I sit beside you instead of opposite?”
Plenty of couples also agree a small private signal, a tap on the table or a look. Practical meal tactics, including earplugs for chewing sounds at a shared table, are a separate topic. Here, the point is that your partner knows the plan in advance.
What do you say to a parent or family member?
Family can be the hardest audience. Try: “Mum, when I hear sniffing or throat clearing at the table, my body reacts before I can think. I love eating with you. Could we have the radio on during Sunday lunch?”
If the answer is “you’re overreacting” or “it’s just manners”, don’t argue it out mid-meal. Share something neutral, such as the Oxford Health page above, and pick it up later when nobody is eating.
If you’re the parent and it’s your teenager reacting to sounds at home, turn the script around: ask which sounds are hardest and what one change they’d like. We look at that side in our guide to teenagers and trigger sounds.
How do you bring it up with a flatmate?
With a flatmate, make the ask about arrangements, not habits. “I react strongly to some sounds, like loud chewing or slurping, and that’s mine to work around. Would you mind if I ate a bit earlier, or wore headphones when we’re both in the kitchen?”
Framing it as your adjustment keeps things friendly, because it isn’t a criticism of how they live.
What do you say to a colleague or line manager?
For a colleague, keep it light and specific: “Some sounds, like gum or pen clicking, are really hard for me. It’s a me thing. Would you mind if I took the end desk for focus work?”
On video calls, “Could you mute while you’re eating?” usually gets a yes straight away, while a vague “that’s distracting” lands as a complaint.
For anything more formal, speak to your line manager. Under the Equality Act 2010, employers must consider reasonable adjustments where a disability puts someone at a disadvantage, and ACAS explains that what counts as reasonable depends on each situation. Misophonia isn’t automatically classed as a disability under the Act, so think of any adjustment as a request, not a guarantee.
Useful asks include a quieter desk or earplugs during focus blocks. The wider picture, including occupational health, is covered in our guide to misophonia at work.
How do you explain it to a friend?
Friends usually need the least detail. “Restaurants can be hard for me because of certain sounds. Could we sit somewhere with a bit of background music?” is plenty.
If a sound gets too much, “I’m nipping out for some air, back in five” keeps the evening going.
What should you leave out of the conversation?
Leave out anything that turns the talk into a verdict on the other person. “You trigger me” puts the blame on them, while “that sound sets off a reaction in me” keeps it about the sound.
Skip the diagnosis debate, the worst-ever stories and the long apologies, and don’t try to explain while the sound is happening. One clear sentence, said calmly, does more than a full history.
Why do so few people know what misophonia is?
In a 2023 study by King’s College London and the University of Oxford, 18.4% of 772 UK adults met the threshold for significant misophonia, yet only 13.6% had ever heard the word (Vitoratou et al., PLOS ONE 2023). So the person in front of you probably isn’t dismissing you; they’ve simply never come across it.
The formal side (is misophonia recognised in the UK, and by whom?) is a separate question, which our explainer answers plainly. If sounds are affecting your day-to-day life, your GP is the place to start, and the Oxford Health service describes the specialist NHS route.
How do you mention earplugs without it becoming the whole conversation?
One sentence is enough: “I might put earplugs in for the meal. It’s not about you, and they’ll come out afterwards.” Our Life+ passive SNR 24 dB reusable silicone earplug (£29.95) sits flush in the ear with no stem, so most people at a table or desk won’t notice it.
Be honest about what an earplug does. It makes every sound quieter, not silent, so a voice stays audible because it is loud, not because a filter passes it. Life+ is made from hypoallergenic silicone with a two-lamella design and lasts up to 100 uses, about 30p a use, and a two-pack (£44.95) ships free, as UK delivery is free over £35.
Use them for chosen moments, then take them out. The NHS advises not wearing earplugs all the time, as this could make you more sensitive to noise, though short-term use may help. Stop if they cause pain or itching, and talk to your GP if sound sensitivity is getting in the way of daily life.
Where should you start?
Start with one person, one calm moment and one sentence. Some people get it straight away, others need a second conversation, and each time you say it, it gets easier.
His connection to hearing protection stems from personal experience with sound sensitivity during live events and work in noisy environments, an issue that made him more aware of the long-term risks of unmanaged noise exposure. Today, as both a communicator and a user of BOLLSEN products, he is passionate about raising awareness around the importance of proactive hearing care.
At BOLLSEN, he develops data-driven marketing campaigns, writes SEO-focused articles, and manages communication channels that connect customers with practical knowledge about hearing protection. His work ensures that BOLLSEN’s message—prioritizing health, performance, and sustainability reaches a global audience in an engaging and trustworthy way.
Passionate about writing since childhood, Timotej combines creativity with a strong analytical approach, continuously testing new ideas in digital marketing, performance advertising, and social media. He believes in learning through innovation and collaboration, balancing leadership with openness to new perspectives.
Beyond his professional role, Timotej is committed to a healthy lifestyle and finds inspiration in fitness, sports, and quality time with friends. His personal passion for well-being aligns with BOLLSEN’s core values, making his work not only a career but also a cause he deeply believes in.